Megsie

Harsh, But True: A compendium of rants from this week.

1. The femme fatale character arc, from sexual power to eventual destruction, may be blatant misogyny, but there is some truth to it. Sluts, however beautiful and promising, eventually stagnate on their own idiocy, but not before ensnaring idiots of the penile variety in order to beget more idiots. This is only a pity (and the stuff of novels) when the slut ensnares a man of nobler birth than herself.

2. An error, however minor, on my part will result in hours of agony, probably tears, and much self-censure. If it appears that I am taking a mistake lightly, it is because I am trying to convince myself that it is not rational to throw oneself in front of a bus because of a minor filing mistake.

3. When reading an adventure novel with zombies featured prominently, I should not find myself dozing off from the author’s mechanical writing style. Don’t enumerate emotion at me, let me experience it.

4. I can’t choose my co-workers, but I can choose my friends and I’m making a conscious effort to purge relationships I probably should have abandoned long ago. This is not necessarily a negative reflection on the people who I have chosen to no longer associate with, but more so a reflection of my choice to move in a different direction in my life. Unfailing loyalty is not the virtue I always held it to be; in many instances it is a crutch.

5. I very much dislike people who are positive all the time. Life is not always kittens and rainbows. Even when it is, very often the kittens pee on the couch and scratch you while you are sleeping. The point is, it’s okay to bitch.

6. There are few things more irritating than new converts. (Or highschool lovers, for that matter). This goes with the previous point. I understand that you are happy, and I’m happy that you are happy, but if I have to HEAR about your happiness one more time, I will rain down a world of hurt on your wee mind until you’re curled up sobbing in a corner. It goes something like this: AIDS! Haiti! Chile! Unemployment! Ingrown toenails! Disease! Child molesters! People who drive too slowly on the freeway! People who tailgate people who drive too slowly on the freeway! Cockroaches! Scratched DVDs! Dirty laundry! Hair in the bathtub drain! American Idol! Killer whales! Rapists! These things didn’t just go away because you think you’re in love with life, Jesus, the girl next door, Buddha, Yoda, or whoever; you’re just high on endorphins and idiocy. Your body is decaying, your sins are not forgiven, your girlfriend is faking it and world peace is not a viable answer to anything. Shut the fuck up. Learn to buck up. You’re absolutely worthless until you value yourself apart from anyone else’s opinions of you.

est finis.